Nothing calms anxious dogs nor builds their self-confidence faster than giving them the gift of choice, the power to control what they can, and the right to consent (to being pet, picked up, brushed, etc.). This is known as “agency and consent.”
Agency doesn’t mean dogs have no rules or boundaries. It means humans allow dogs the opportunity to make choices over the things that we can.
This is far simpler than most people realize. We interact with our dogs many times each day. Every one of those interactions is an opportunity to build trust and increase a dog’s self-confidence and their quality of life.
For example:
- There’s a HUGE difference to dogs between putting them in their pen, crate, or car seat, and giving them the opportunity to do those things on their own power. It only costs us a little time and patience but it empowers our dogs and makes them feel more secure.
- The next time you’re petting your dog, stop. If they move towards you, paw you or rub against your hand, they’re asking for more. This is your dog consenting to being pet.
- Moving towards dogs to put on a harness or leash is a gentle form of “force” for dogs. Sitting and asking a dog to come to us for the same purpose builds trust and helps them feel confident in our interaction.
- Loose-leash walking empowers dogs because it teaches them to choose to walk with us. Dogs who pull on the leash are often insecure when they see dogs or people on walks because they feel like they’re on their own, when it comes to perceived threats.
- Many dogs become intolerant of brushing and other grooming tasks because we tend to try to force them to remain still. When we allow dogs to end a grooming session on their terms, dogs are more comfortable and over time willing to tolerate this interaction for longer periods with each practice.
- Instead of carrying your dog to the tub for baths, allow them to enter the bathroom on their own steam. Use a treat trail, if necessary, to get them to walk in there a few times before starting a bath.
If your dog is anxious or fearful, allowing them to make simple choices like these can have a positive effect on their emotional state and on their willingness to cooperate with you, rather than resist.
If you’d like a more cooperative relationship with your puppy or dog, I can help. I’ve specialized in anxious, fearful and reactive dog rehabilitation for more than 20 years. I’ve helped thousands of dogs on the westside become calmer and less reactive, and helped their guardians to better understand and communicate with their sensitive pups.
Please drop me an email and tell me about your canine companion.
Dee Green has been a professional puppy coach, dog trainer and canine behavior consultant for more than 20 years. She specializes in puppies up to 18 months, and fearful, anxious and reactive dogs of all ages